Letters to my younger selves

Dear 18 year old Mubash, I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. I remember you as so eager. Eager to please, eager to fit in, eager to succeed – whatever that meant. You travelled halfway across the world to start a new phase of life, the college years, the America years, the first timeContinue reading “Letters to my younger selves”

Saving myself….#dVerse

This is a poem about struggling with depression and anxiety, and writing it has helped me with both today. I don’t know whether reading it will help the reader or make them feel as terrible as me so fair warning. It’s unedited and raw, and no doubt will read as somewhat angsty and maybe immatureContinue reading “Saving myself….#dVerse”

Of love and laundry….#dVerse

It’s 2.12 am here and I can’t sleep so have written my first verses for Poetics hosted by dVerse. The theme is laundry. It’s my first time participating in anything like this and I can’t quite wrap my head around the fact that it’s a poem about laundry, written on the notes of my phone.Continue reading “Of love and laundry….#dVerse”

I don’t do poetry but…

Untitled I don’t do poetry but sometimes, a picture, a moment, a fleeting feeling – makes prose seem inadequate. Like when I saw that one little flower so delicate and fragile but still alive peeking out amongst its long dead companions. Or maybe it’s just me, always looking for signs in a world of coincidences.Continue reading “I don’t do poetry but…”

Sometimes woman, sometimes flower ~ always blooming

Dear dedicated fan of this illustrious blog, You’ve probably lost a lot of sleep in the last few weeks over the lack of posts here. I apologise, I never meant to cause you distress. I know how you all probably schedule your week around reading my latest post. The truth is I haven’t felt likeContinue reading “Sometimes woman, sometimes flower ~ always blooming”

Anti-blackness & your brown family, A conundrum

How many of you have had a conversation with your brown families on racism and anti-blackness, in light of everything that’s happened in the past week? If you’re not in the US currently, and you happen to be in Bangladesh or any other place where the coronavirus pandemic is actually peaking right now and yourContinue reading “Anti-blackness & your brown family, A conundrum”

London, my love

My first visit to London was nine years ago. It was the summer after eleventh grade, and I was going to the UK for a family trip. I was sixteen, and mostly disgruntled about missing prom (I was having a particularly ungrateful privileged teenager moment). Part of my mom’s mission for taking me on thisContinue reading “London, my love”

In search of home

A few days ago I got a phone call from the Bangladesh High Commission here in London, asking for my passport information. A flight is being arranged, they said, and you’re on the list. We’ll get you home. Home. I’ve long come to believe home is a feeling, not a place. To me, it’s whereContinue reading “In search of home”

Food for the soul, literally

There’s a viral meme going around depicting a massive queue of people waiting to audition for Masterchef once this pandemic is over. Given the sudden rise in cooking endeavors I’ve noticed just in my immediate circle in the past month, I’m beginning to feel this might not be too far-fetched of a joke. Food isContinue reading “Food for the soul, literally”

A pandemic Pohela Boishakh

In an alternate universe somewhere, it’s the day before Pohela Boishakh (Bengali New Year, for those unfortunate ones not in the know) and I’m in my bedroom in Dhaka, picking earrings to wear with the saree I’m going to wear tomorrow. My mom is in the kitchen, making sure the bhortas are all prepped forContinue reading “A pandemic Pohela Boishakh”